Rebecca’s Birth Story

Written by
Melissa is a wife, mom and experienced gestational carrier. She has a history as a paralegal, focusing on surrogacy and ART law, and now helps guide and support individuals throughout their surrogacy journey. Melissa is the Lead Advocate and Digital Creator for Stronger Together Surrogacy.
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Rebecca’s Birth Story

An Early Arrival

The Intended Parents came about a week before the induction date at a nearby rental home. Due to her size, induction was scheduled for March 16 with an initial Due Date of April 4th!

We stayed in a hotel the night before that was only about a mile away from the hospital since we had to be there early the next morning. It was sunny but chilly when we got to the Hospital. We had to check in at 8am that morning and the Intended Parents were already there when we arrived.

My Support System

My husband was with me the entire time. He was super supportive. The doctors and nurses were amazing. I loved that the nurse who was there when we arrived was with us the entire day. Her shift was to end at 7pm, but she stayed after because I was finally in active labor. They did their best to fulfill every request that I had. I had a lot of mixed emotions that day as I was waiting on things to progress. I was excited to finally have her, but I was also sad that this was going to be the end of my journey.

Active Labor

When active labor finally started, it was quick! Even though we checked into the hospital at 8 that morning, I didn’t start IV medication until about 1030am. The doctors came in to check dilation around 1pm, I was at a 3. They broke my water, so they thought. They said that when they broke it, it would drip, not gush. A few hours passed, and I still didn’t have any fluid leaking out. They came in to check in around 5pm and discovered that it did not break the first time. This time, there was a gush.

Originally, I thought for sure that I was going to go through labor without having an epidural. I quickly changed my mind as the labor pains were extremely intense and felt different from my past deliveries. I got the epidural within an hour of breaking my water. When it was time to push, it seemed like the entire hospital staff came into the room. I still don’t know why so many people were present, about 10 doctors and nurses, but it made me feel safe and less worried about something going wrong. She was born around 730pm. It only took 2 pushes; she was so tiny compared to my babies.

Reflecting

The one thing I wish I had done differently was letting the parents be in the room more. They were in there during delivery, but I asked that they stay behind the curtain. I think I did it this way because I had just met them for the first time in person the week before, and I just wasn’t comfortable enough yet. I wish I had let them be more involved while waiting for things to progress. Looking back, I guess I was just sort of shy, and they didn’t get into the room until minutes before she was born.

I remember being able to see the parents standing behind the curtain. They were holding each other, just waiting for their baby to arrive. The room was full but quiet. Not a sound out of anyone. We were all just waiting on me to feel pressure again so I could start pushing.

What was only a few minutes felt like forever. The pressure finally came, and it was time to push. After 2 pushes, there she was! Seeing the parents hold their baby for the first time was such an amazing feeling! You can’t even put into words the feeling you get.

Visiting in the Hospital

I had to stay for a full 24 hours before I could go home. I didn’t have any visitors, which was nice in a way. The baby and her parents were in the room next to us, so we did go visit with them a few times. Holding her and seeing her was weird at first. I didn’t even feel like I had given birth to her but at the same time I had so much care for her.

Home at Last

It was great to be back home. It was a weird feeling not being pregnant anymore and not having a baby to care for. I think I got lucky the first week home. My kids were home for spring break, and my husband stayed home with me that week as well. So, we stayed relatively busy. The second week is when the emotions started to hit. This was just the normal hormone emotions. I would find myself crying literally for no reason. Luckily, that part only lasted about a week.

I was able to pump for the baby while they were still local. That was a good feeling. I would deliver milk to them once a week, and we would visit for a while. I believe that this was super helpful during the healing process. It was so nice being able to bond and get to know each other better since we didn’t have that chance during the pregnancy. Also, holding her while I was there was a huge bonus. It was a little rough when it was time for them to finally head back home. I cried most of the way home that day after seeing them for the last time.

A Supportive Team: Stronger Together Surrogacy

Working with Stronger Together Surrogacy was amazing! Everyone was super helpful when I needed them and had questions, I had so many questions! I love that the agency is small and that everyone has been a surrogate themselves.

Dear Future Surrogates:

My advice to future surrogates would be to embrace the journey. You’re doing such an amazing thing and something not just anyone can do. Helping to create a family is incredible in every way. Some days are going to be a struggle, but I promise, in the end, it is totally worth it!

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